My story
“My English teacher at school tried to tell me that I could improve a grade if I put in a bit of effort - but I didn't believe her, and my marks stayed the same.”
"My husband loves escaping into nature to process his thoughts - but I told myself he was running away from me."
"When my first child was born, the nurse said I would become the expert on this baby - but all I could see was the mistakes I made, and I felt like an inadequate mom."
"My siblings were both successful in their careers, and perhaps I was too - but I thought that I would never be as good as them."
These were the kinds of stories that were keeping me trapped in a cycle of constantly trying to do better, and yet, never feeling good enough. It felt hopeless.
Until I started to reflect on these stories that I was holding onto, and the impact that they were having on my thoughts, my emotions, and how I behaved. After much contemplation, considering my stories in the light of my faith and with the insight of trusted others, I started to realise that there were other stories that I was not paying attention to.
There were times when I had done well. There were moments with loved ones that proved that I was valuable to them. I started to change my perspective, and view myself and my world with a new lens. The impact on my life was significant.
After my own experience, I started listening to friends, family, and others in my life. More and more I realised that the lenses we wear, or the stories we tell ourselves, have a huge impact on our lives. Holding onto beliefs about ourselves, or things that we have heard or concluded from past life experiences, can keep us in destructive patterns of behaviour and emotional chaos. Further, examining these beliefs and thoughts often reveals that they are deceptive, and not the whole truth – we are often holding onto lies that are keeping us captive.
This led me to switch from a career in market research, study further and become a Registered Counsellor. I aim to enable others to challenge their patterns and perspectives, and find a new, or more complete, story; one that leads to a life that is more satisfying, dignified, and empowering.
